Lesson 9 - Typical Teen A Disadvantage

Paris Bennett aka Princess P Last night was a very difficult one in my house. The neighbor came over for medicinal reasons, stayed for pizza (it was delivery not DiGiornio) and apparently got too relaxed and didn't want to leave thereby interfering with my normal evening of TV watching. And when I say normal, I mean having a good cry when one of my favorite contestants is voted off the show. It really was a sad event made worse by a likeable neighbor who was stuck to my sofa. I'll be honest, I did retreat to my bedroom for little cursing (damn American Idol voters) and then, with that out of the way, I began my struggle to figure out why this cute little girl with a future that is limitless would be sent packing while others (i.e. the wedding singer) are still around. Then sometime in the wee hours of the morning, it hit me...indigestion that is. And so there I sat, on the throne, at 2am playing solitaire on my handy little electronic game thingy-ma-jigger when I suddenly gave birth...to a thought. You see, Paris is a typical 17 year old. She's still figuring out life. Heck, until recently, she didn't even want to be a performer, but somewhere along the line her heritage and talent proved too strong and so she showed up to audition and she's consistently blown us away. The problem though is that as a teenager, who is the most teenager of any ever on the show, she is/was still searching for her niche. Her song selection - her clothing selection (heck, she could have lost for that hideous outfit she wore for her second number the other night) - her wigs - all changed with great frequency, leaving we the voters with the feeling that we never really got to know her. Thankfully, the thing that has never changed about her is that amazing voice - both of them in fact - one that sounds like Minnie Mouse and the other who sounds a young Aretha. This talented little girl will go far I predict! Just you wait! Good luck Princess P - the Paris in my house blew you a kiss last night. He's sad! j.

Two for the $$

I'd like to take a moment and say "See, people really do pay attention to little ole' me!" Last week I casually mentioned that it appeared to me that Ms. McPhee had a slight wardrobe malfunction. I don't follow American Idol blogs (besides my own of course), but I have a feeling there was probably a bit of chatter about her little faux paux. However, my people over at Fox entertainment (shout out to Dorothy Lucey at Fox 11) never seemed to report on this, at least while I was watching which is admittedly not a whole lot, and since not even the smallest piece of dirt escapes them, I figured I must have been the only one who reported on the incident. How surprised was I last night then to hear the man whose opinion matters as much as the price of tea in Uzbekistan, start chattering about a "wardrobe malfuntion." I knew it wasn't the weed! Having gotten that out of the way, let's chat a bit about last night. We are now to a place in the competition where we are treated to not one, but two numbers by each contestant. And, we even get wardrobe changes. Woo Hoo!! Problem is that all the contestants only provided us with one good number. Why is it that evertime there's a little change on the show, the contestants seem to be playing catch up? Didn't they have warning for a while that there would be two songs? Well, apparently change is hard! That's not to say that it was a total waste last night because there were some good performances. And, to be honest, this week is by far the worst week for me so far in the competition because I don't know who will go home. I know who I would like to go home, but I don't see it happening. Which leaves me with alternatives I'm not too fond of. But, enough of the chatter...let's get down to what really matters...the music... Elliott Yamin On Broadway Birthyear - 1978: Not his greatest performance and it left me a little queazy because the last contestant to sing this number was sent packing the next night (remember Scott Savol?). Home Well, he sang this song by Michael Buble really well, and, like Randy, I was glad to see a tender side to him. This particular song is a bit boring though which didn't do Elliott any favors. And, it's never a good omen when you sing about wanting to go home. I'm scared for this kid! Paris Bennett Kiss Birthyear -1988: Holy Hell! I was already out of highschool when this child was born. I'm getting old I guess. We all know and love this song by Prince and Princess P did just ok. I was not impressed or unimpressed. Bored is more like it. Be Without You I love Mary J. Blige and Paris did a pretty good job of representing. Paris is now the youngest contestant on the show and while she has a wealth of experience, I sort of getting the feeling that she's still a kid and doesn't quite have the maturity of the other contestants (ok...maybe not Taylor). She could go this week and honestly, I'd be very sad. Not shocked...but sad! Scott Stapp - ummm, I mean Chris Daughtry Renegade Birthyear -1979: For those who don't know, Scott Stapp is (was) the lead vocalist for the band Creed. Chris does a remarkable job, week after week, of showing us that he is cut out for the somewhat out of date genre that Creed helped to popularize. He did ok with this song...actually probably the second best performance of the night. But still...I'm tiring of him! I Dare You Ok, I've never heard this song before. I don't know who Shinedown is and frankly could care less. I do know that Chris should have blown this song out of the water. Instead he sounded like a cat trying to clear multiple hairballs. Thanks to those on-top-of-it judges, Chris did receive good cover (voice giving out) he didn't really need anyway as we all know he's safe for a while longer. Katharine McPhee Against All Odds Birthyear - 1984: I've heard several people say that this was absolutely the worst performance of the night. ~foxy coxy~ and I are in complete agreement. She should have NAILED this Phil Collins number! At least she looked hot! Black Horse and the Cherry Tree I have never heard this song before last night and couldn't tell you who the hell KT Tunstall is but damn, this was in fact my favorite performance of the night. I replayed it over and over and over and over. I have the McPheever by the time she was done. That little number, in my humble opinion, secured her a spot in the final four. Taylor Hicks Play That Funky Music Birthyear - 1976: ~foxy coxy~ called to tell me she was through, through, through with the wedding singer. I agree! But I don't think he'll go home. So many bar and bat mitzvah's to perform drunk (or stoned) for and yet, we the American Idol voters, are keeping him from his calling. Something I'm sorry to sound confused here, but I thought the second number was supposed to be from one of the current Billboard charts. What Billboard chart did Taylor pull a 35 year old song by the little known band the Beatles from? Huh? Tell me! It was an ok performance I'll admit but it drove a point home for me that Taylor, as fun as he is, is really just a bar singer whose time on Idol has come. Unfortunately, I don't think the majority of American Idol voters will agree. Someone has to go this week and I'd like for it to be Taylor because I think his usefullness to the show has come to a crashing halt. It won't be and I'm now forced to say that it will either be Elliott or Paris...neither of whom deserve to go home just yet. I did manage to get in about 50 votes for Elliott last night and I feel pretty certain that ~foxy coxy~ got in more than her allotted 3 per minute in. Now, I don't know if that's an actual bar laid down by Idol phone people, but ~foxy coxy~ in her something-induced haze last night, proceeded to tell me. So...who do you think should go tonight? j.